How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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