i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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