therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
