S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
