don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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