im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
