Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Girls should come with a carfax report
found the other keg... it's in the tree
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Randomize
