you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
