she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
