I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
