i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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