Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize