Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
