I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
