Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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