I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
