i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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