I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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