i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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