i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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