so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Randomize