I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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