yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
should my penis look like a turkey
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
