i think my tv is drunk
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
