i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
