I want to walk on stilts...naked
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Randomize
