I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
