New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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