All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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