I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
