I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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