Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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