She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Just puked most of my soul out..
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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