we're blogging at a bar
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
