google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wish life had little blips of pornography
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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