I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
