nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
