I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
