I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
