We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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