One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
