Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
