I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
