all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
