I don't usually arrange sex via text message
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Swine flu is the new snow day.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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