id be glad to
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
