Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
