is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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