Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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