I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
